So let’s sit here for a minute, looking for all those smaller achievements. The things that made you stronger this year. The challenges you overcame. The new people, projects or activities that entered your life. And finally the truths you have uncovered, that you didn’t believe in or know of twelve months ago. Look at all this personal development, on top of the ‘external’ realisations you have brought forth. What are the lessons in all those events, months and all the hustle?
I feel very blessed for another year living the life I have purposedly designed. Whilst last year was very much a ‘set-up’ year in my new career, this year felt like the year I embraced what I have and nurtured it. And here are all the lessons I collected along the way, from my experience and all the teachers I have around me:
- If it isn’t fun, change it. I use my degree of enjoyment as a barometer. When it gets low, I now know something has to change. I practiced this in my business, and gave myself permission to implement things that felt good to me. Concretely I pulled away from social media, launched my own webinars, designed new content and started doing workshops. So where is your fun barometer at?
- Don’t wait to arrive at the ‘perfect destination’: there isn’t one. With every step up come new needs, and new questions. Life is always 50-50, with good and bad at every level. Waiting for some external event or success to give you 100% fulfillment is like a proxy error. Instead, decide to be content now, enjoying what you have, and get excited about what’s ahead. Full stop.
- Making choices always pays off: it can feel hard in the moment because you let go of an opportunity or a specific person. But over time it won’t feel hard anymore, and you will realise it was necessary. That is when you know you are actually making progress. So make those choices, in accordance with what matters to you.
- The fear is in my head: if you thought I don’t experience fear, think again! Of course I get fearful thoughts a lot of the time. But overtime I realise how those thoughts are less and less tangible. So I choose not to give them power. It’s like I squeeze them down until I don’t feel affected anymore.
- Don’t wait for permission: this is a big one from the recent months especially, both for myself and the women I coach. I realised so much is hanging over this permission we are waiting for. We need to stop hoping, pondering, fearing other people’s feelings or judgment, and do what we deeply desire. This gives you wings. And this ups the fun barometer too.
- Believing in yourself is a combination of internal and external work: many people say ‘fake it until you make it’. I found this challenging to execute for myself. Instead, I got help. I worked with my coach, listened to many podcasts, talked to trusted people. This helped me take action. Then the action, even if not always successful, gave me the mental boost I needed. So if you want to get to the next step, don’t do it on your own. Get help so you can start taking action, then you will start believing.
I hope some of the above lessons resonate with you, and with the kind of year you’ve had. I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments, and what learning this year has brought you. Meanwhile you can also download my 2018-2019 Planner to capture those thoughts, and plan for a strong year in 2019. Happy reflecting, may the end of year bring you peace, joy and clarity.
